Those that know me know that one of my pet hates is the way a person with a disability can be so poorly described by (most of) the media.
Here's a classic case in point, from a New Zealand TV Program. It's a great, hopeful story(for the most part). So it makes me wonder WHY did the headline have to read "Cerebral palsy patient gains, then loses, her voice". What's wrong with saying "Girl with cerebral palsy gains, then loses, her voice"? The girl in question was not ill, so she's not a patient. She's a GIRL.
People with disabilities are PEOPLE first. All with individual abilities, interests and needs. There's no need to stereotype anyone into being a condition that they may have - the CP boy, the autistic girl, the mentally ill man. Instead, the boy with CP, the girl with autism, the man with a mental illness.
This is called People First language. Sounds like common sense to me.
Tuesday, 16 June 2009
Monday, 25 May 2009
The I've Been Corrected Blues
Driving with the whole family in the car, listening to Jazztrack, a favourite program of ours on ABC FM radio. A bluesy number came on and I decided to take the opportunity to educate the kids as to the sound and form of The Blues. Chuckles, the two year old, interrupted me.
"No Mum" he said, removing his dummy from his mouth and adopting a posture of authority. "Dis NOT boooos. Dis JAZZ."
And with more coolness than Miles Davis himself, Chuckles popped his dummy back in his mouth and continued staring out the window as if he hadn't spoken at all.
I wish I had even a little of that confidence.
EDITED TO ADD: This morning Darling Husband remarked upon some clever little thing Chuckles had done. "You're a cool dude!" he said. Chuckles hit back with "No, I'm AWESOME!".
Hmph.
Confidence.
He is pretty awesome though : )
"No Mum" he said, removing his dummy from his mouth and adopting a posture of authority. "Dis NOT boooos. Dis JAZZ."
And with more coolness than Miles Davis himself, Chuckles popped his dummy back in his mouth and continued staring out the window as if he hadn't spoken at all.
I wish I had even a little of that confidence.
EDITED TO ADD: This morning Darling Husband remarked upon some clever little thing Chuckles had done. "You're a cool dude!" he said. Chuckles hit back with "No, I'm AWESOME!".
Hmph.
Confidence.
He is pretty awesome though : )
Thursday, 21 May 2009
Pain logic
Princess, we know, has a high tolerance to physical pain. The poking and prodding she has sometimes had to endure would bring tears to the eyes of the most stoic individual (and often has to mine). Princess, however, seems to be made of very tough stuff and though I know she does feel pain, sometimes it's hard to know to what degree. She really doesn't seem to like giving much away.
Last Friday afternoon she had an inexplicably swollen ankle, but was tight-lipped as to how or when the cause of it happened, or even if it was hurting her. Finally, after a discussion about going to the doctor for an x-ray she blurted out that it DID hurt but she didn't want to go to the hospital (which we unfortunately ended up doing because no other x-ray places were open).
She then told us it had happened the night before (I remember the likely incident - had no idea she had actually HURT herself!). In hindsight, she had been teary that morning, but I couldn't pin-point why. All day at school she had quietly endured the pain, and after school she remained tight-lipped - all because she didn't want to go to the doctor. And who can blame her?
Sigh. A child's logic can be so heartbreakingly logical.
End result: No broken bones. Probably stretched ligaments. Definitely a much wiser mother. And Princess is all smiles again.
(PS. I know I'm not the only parent of a child who thinks things through...)
Last Friday afternoon she had an inexplicably swollen ankle, but was tight-lipped as to how or when the cause of it happened, or even if it was hurting her. Finally, after a discussion about going to the doctor for an x-ray she blurted out that it DID hurt but she didn't want to go to the hospital (which we unfortunately ended up doing because no other x-ray places were open).
She then told us it had happened the night before (I remember the likely incident - had no idea she had actually HURT herself!). In hindsight, she had been teary that morning, but I couldn't pin-point why. All day at school she had quietly endured the pain, and after school she remained tight-lipped - all because she didn't want to go to the doctor. And who can blame her?
Sigh. A child's logic can be so heartbreakingly logical.
End result: No broken bones. Probably stretched ligaments. Definitely a much wiser mother. And Princess is all smiles again.
(PS. I know I'm not the only parent of a child who thinks things through...)
Saturday, 9 May 2009
Happy Mothers' Day
At the risk of sounding like I'm having a bit of a whinge, I didn't know it was possible to be as busy as I feel I've been over the last several weeks. Maybe it's just me, maybe it's the universe - I'm convinced that time is speeding up and 24hrs ain't as long as it used to be!
Naturally, most of what has been taking up my time is kid-related. The school-day routine, the taxi-ing around. Dealing daily with what goes on inside a child's mind (it's never predictable). Appointments with schools, doctors, therapists, squeezing in the odd playdate, a brief moment of respite at the park with Chuckles. Every couple of days there's the '8-hr break' I call paid work. (That's a joke, actually. Not much of a break at all, though coming home to bathed children and a cooked dinner is a huge plus!). And then of course dealing with things coming out of nowhere that have to be dealt with asap! And they seem to happen more and more frequently.
Phew. I admit I had no idea this was what it would be to be A Mother.
But I'm not alone - I'm supported by my Darling Husband, who knows I know he does more than his fair share. He keeps me afloat. Save him for Father's Day.
I'm also lucky enough to have the support of my own Mum. My Mum, who has been there for me, always. Who, in addition to all the normal expectations of a grandparent (ie, loving, fun and caring towards grandchildren), has once again added routine child-care, taxi-ing, important appointment accompanying and provision not only of meals and baths (see comment above), but also provision of occasional family holidays and child-free weekends, to her formidable repertoire of skills. And there's so much more I haven't mentioned. What a woman. Mum, thankyou.
And while I'm at it, I must also add the support from my sister, Aunty T. She too is always there for us - a fun and reliable child carer, and quite often a saving grace. Definitely gets an honourable mention for Mothers' Day!
I've already been quite spoilt by the kids - Little Man and Princess have been busy beavering away at their gifts for me - not to mention Mothers' morning teas put on by Princess' Prep class and Little Man's Scouts troop. More homemade chocolates and coconut balls than you could poke a stick at!
I feel very blessed indeed.
And so to all the mums out there reading this, especially mine, I wish you a very happy Mothers' Day.
Naturally, most of what has been taking up my time is kid-related. The school-day routine, the taxi-ing around. Dealing daily with what goes on inside a child's mind (it's never predictable). Appointments with schools, doctors, therapists, squeezing in the odd playdate, a brief moment of respite at the park with Chuckles. Every couple of days there's the '8-hr break' I call paid work. (That's a joke, actually. Not much of a break at all, though coming home to bathed children and a cooked dinner is a huge plus!). And then of course dealing with things coming out of nowhere that have to be dealt with asap! And they seem to happen more and more frequently.
Phew. I admit I had no idea this was what it would be to be A Mother.
But I'm not alone - I'm supported by my Darling Husband, who knows I know he does more than his fair share. He keeps me afloat. Save him for Father's Day.
I'm also lucky enough to have the support of my own Mum. My Mum, who has been there for me, always. Who, in addition to all the normal expectations of a grandparent (ie, loving, fun and caring towards grandchildren), has once again added routine child-care, taxi-ing, important appointment accompanying and provision not only of meals and baths (see comment above), but also provision of occasional family holidays and child-free weekends, to her formidable repertoire of skills. And there's so much more I haven't mentioned. What a woman. Mum, thankyou.
And while I'm at it, I must also add the support from my sister, Aunty T. She too is always there for us - a fun and reliable child carer, and quite often a saving grace. Definitely gets an honourable mention for Mothers' Day!
I've already been quite spoilt by the kids - Little Man and Princess have been busy beavering away at their gifts for me - not to mention Mothers' morning teas put on by Princess' Prep class and Little Man's Scouts troop. More homemade chocolates and coconut balls than you could poke a stick at!
I feel very blessed indeed.
And so to all the mums out there reading this, especially mine, I wish you a very happy Mothers' Day.
Thursday, 16 April 2009
Long time
..between posts. Have been way too busy with Easter break/school holidays and working on something quite special - all will be revealed soon enough on this blog!
In the meantime, some food for thought (and a bit of reading):
Some weeks ago, Sue Corrigan, journalist and mother of a teenage son with Cerebral Palsy, wrote an article for The Australian about the sorry state of disability services across Australia.
A few days later, Bill Shorten MP, (federal) Parliamentary Secretary for Disabilities and Children's Services gave this speech at a Press Club lunch in Canberra.
It's time for action.
In the meantime, some food for thought (and a bit of reading):
Some weeks ago, Sue Corrigan, journalist and mother of a teenage son with Cerebral Palsy, wrote an article for The Australian about the sorry state of disability services across Australia.
A few days later, Bill Shorten MP, (federal) Parliamentary Secretary for Disabilities and Children's Services gave this speech at a Press Club lunch in Canberra.
It's time for action.
Wednesday, 25 March 2009
A Feel Good Moment
This is the front of a home-made birthday card given to Princess by one of her new best friends, Miss J. They're in the same Prep class at the mainstream school. Here, Miss J is on the left, Princess on the right, obviously.
What I love most about this picture is the HUGE smile on Princess' face - Miss J nailed the portrait right there, pigtails and all.
And the sheer acceptance of it.
Love it.
Tuesday, 10 March 2009
Happy Birthday Princess!
Our Princess is having a birthday today. She's 5 years old now!
I can't believe how the time since she was born has flown by. What a beautiful little grown-up girl we have now. And the ups and downs we've had in those five years. The many moments of Princess's life that I replay over and over again in my mind, whether I want to or not. The guilt I feel that because of unknown circumstances in my body before and during her very premature birth, she has permanent physical impairment and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Life-changing for us, and for her, in a way she will never fully be able to appreciate the way we do.
To be honest, I sometimes feel I'm as much in shock now as I was five years ago. When we first learned that not only did we have an extremely premature baby, but that she would have 'special' needs. That 'special' is a pretty big word.
And special she is. Princess is a delightfully cheeky kid, a happy little girl who loves imagining big stories, yelling at or with her brothers, playing with her school friends... And all the friends she has, child and adult, who delight in her achievements and enjoy her wry observations.
I've often wondered what she thinks about having a disability. There have been hairy questions from her in the past, and no doubt there'll be many more in the future. But she surprised me recently...
We were driving out to go shopping when I remarked that I'd forgotten to put our blue 'disability parking' sticker back in the car, having removed it earlier. Quick as a flash, Princess asked "Mummy, if we don't have the sticker, does that mean I don't have a disability anymore?"
My mind raced into panic. This was another of those moments, like the time she wanted to dance like her baby brother all by herself without anyone helping or any equipment near her, all by herself and wouldn't take "let's do something else" for an answer. I had to have a well-worded response. Be gentle but honest. Think...Think!
Then I heard a giggly chortle from the back seat. Looking in the rear view mirror, I could see a broad grin on Princess's face. Oh good one, honey. You got me. Phew.
"What do you think?" I asked her. Smiling her broad smile, she said "No, of course not! That would be silly!" Giggle. Oh bless you, my wonderful, understanding and well-grounded daughter. Until the next hairy question anyway.
So, like our darling boys, Princess has her life and we help her live it. She is quite truly one of the most delightful little souls that ever came onto this earth, and for all the ups and downs, I cannot imagine my life without her. We truly are so very lucky.
Happy birthday my oh so SPECIAL little girl.
I can't believe how the time since she was born has flown by. What a beautiful little grown-up girl we have now. And the ups and downs we've had in those five years. The many moments of Princess's life that I replay over and over again in my mind, whether I want to or not. The guilt I feel that because of unknown circumstances in my body before and during her very premature birth, she has permanent physical impairment and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Life-changing for us, and for her, in a way she will never fully be able to appreciate the way we do.
To be honest, I sometimes feel I'm as much in shock now as I was five years ago. When we first learned that not only did we have an extremely premature baby, but that she would have 'special' needs. That 'special' is a pretty big word.
And special she is. Princess is a delightfully cheeky kid, a happy little girl who loves imagining big stories, yelling at or with her brothers, playing with her school friends... And all the friends she has, child and adult, who delight in her achievements and enjoy her wry observations.
I've often wondered what she thinks about having a disability. There have been hairy questions from her in the past, and no doubt there'll be many more in the future. But she surprised me recently...
We were driving out to go shopping when I remarked that I'd forgotten to put our blue 'disability parking' sticker back in the car, having removed it earlier. Quick as a flash, Princess asked "Mummy, if we don't have the sticker, does that mean I don't have a disability anymore?"
My mind raced into panic. This was another of those moments, like the time she wanted to dance like her baby brother all by herself without anyone helping or any equipment near her, all by herself and wouldn't take "let's do something else" for an answer. I had to have a well-worded response. Be gentle but honest. Think...Think!
Then I heard a giggly chortle from the back seat. Looking in the rear view mirror, I could see a broad grin on Princess's face. Oh good one, honey. You got me. Phew.
"What do you think?" I asked her. Smiling her broad smile, she said "No, of course not! That would be silly!" Giggle. Oh bless you, my wonderful, understanding and well-grounded daughter. Until the next hairy question anyway.
So, like our darling boys, Princess has her life and we help her live it. She is quite truly one of the most delightful little souls that ever came onto this earth, and for all the ups and downs, I cannot imagine my life without her. We truly are so very lucky.
Happy birthday my oh so SPECIAL little girl.
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